Joy List: Why you should definitely keep a Joy List

When someone says they're not feeling well right now, the immediate response from many is, "Have you ever tried keeping a gratitude journal?" And yes, remembering the things we have and for which we can be grateful is good. But is it really the solution to all our problems?

I have to admit that I haven't had much use for the journaling concept. I tried it for months and diligently wrote down everything I was grateful for every evening. My problem: With a few exceptions, the same things were on the page every day (health, a happy marriage, a nice apartment as a retreat, enough money to do the things that are important to me, etc.). And of course, it can be helpful to constantly remind yourself of what you're rich in instead of focusing on what you (supposedly) lack. But the effect eventually wore off for me due to daily repetition.

Joy List: What makes me happy?

An exciting concept that works much better for me is the Joy List. It's simply about listing things that bring us joy. This could be something delicious to eat, a good book, peace and quiet, time in nature, exercise, or a party. "At their core, joy lists are a kind of lighthouse that can guide us to consciously cultivate moments, activities, and connections that make us happy," psychologist Alyssa Scolari explains to "The Good Trade." It's about capturing the good moments to remind us of what brings us joy in difficult times. This way, we can then actively do something from the list to make ourselves happier and more content.

The Joy List principle is based on positive psychology. According to Harvard Health, the focus is on promoting happiness and emotional satisfaction. The three pillars of this psychological concept are connecting with others, consciously cultivating pleasure, and developing gratitude. And this is precisely where the Joy List comes in: "It counteracts the tendency to endlessly dwell on negative experiences and emotions," says Alyssa Scolari. "Because that can promote feelings of depression and anxiety."

To be clear: Of course, a joy list is no substitute for therapy. When we have a mental illness, even a long list of pleasant moments won't help. So if you feel like nothing brings you joy anymore, you might want to talk to a doctor or therapist about it.

But for those everyday downer moments, the dull days, the daily grind that sometimes just gets on our nerves, a Joy List can be a helpful technique to remind us that it's okay to consciously give ourselves joy and pleasure.

Here's how: How a Joy List helps you become happier

1. Unlike a gratitude journal, there are no set rules about when, how often, or in what form you should maintain your Joy List. Simply write down something whenever you notice something in your daily life that brings you joy. Whether you write it on a piece of paper that fits in your wallet, in a journal of sorts that you always carry with you, or in a note on your phone is entirely up to you.
2. Now try to consciously integrate the activities or things that bring you moments of happiness into your daily life. It's certainly not always easy, but even ten minutes a day consciously spent doing something that's good for you can lift your mood. Perhaps you could create a calendar entry that reminds you daily that it's time to dance for a few minutes, watch the birds from the balcony, read, or pick or buy a bouquet of flowers.
3. Once you've filled and used your Joy List for a few weeks, listen carefully to yourself: How are you feeling with it? Does it help you to consciously remember the moments and activities you enjoy? Are you able to incorporate them into your daily life and thus use them for your own happiness? If that's not the case, you could explore why. Perhaps you need different "Moments of Joy" or a higher or lower frequency at which you bring them out.

The Joy List helps me a lot. It reminds me of how many things there are that bring me joy and make me happy without much effort, and how easy it is to integrate them into my life. And yes: The concept of the Joy List certainly has parallels to the idea of the gratitude journal. Because reminding ourselves of what brings us joy in difficult times also fuels gratitude. But the path to the goal definitely works better for me.

Brigitte

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