The 7 pillars of self-care: How to bring balance and contentment into your life

What is self-care – a bubble bath with wine and chocolate? While these can certainly help us feel better, they usually only provide short-term relief. In the long run, we need more to be holistically healthy, content, and balanced. If we're working too much, fighting off sleep deprivation with coffee, and, out of stress, only eating kebabs and fries instead of cooking (or having someone cook) something nutritious, then a bath and a glass of red wine won't solve the problem either.

Instead, we can look at what we need long-term to feel good on all levels. Ultimately, only you can know what the ultimate self-care concept looks like for you. While some people thrive on social interactions and exciting hobbies, others need more rest and relaxation to recharge. Self-care means constantly reminding ourselves of what we need for a healthy and happy life – and implementing it in the long term.

As a helpful guide, we have compiled the seven most important pillars of self-care for you, all of which are equally important and ideally receive the same amount of attention from you.

The 7 pillars of self-care for a happy life 1. Mental self-care

Mental or intellectual self-care is about your mindset. How you deal with your thoughts is essential for your holistic health. Because if you constantly think negatively and persist in these old patterns, you'll probably fail—not surprisingly—to achieve many things. Fortunately, we can train our brains. You can do this through mindfulness exercises and meditation, for example, but also by learning a new skill. Curiosity and openness are important skills for good mental health.

2. Emotional self-care

What emotional needs do you have? As simple as this question sounds, answering it can be complex if we truly engage with it. Because only if we can allow, understand, and process our feelings will we thrive in the long run. Unfortunately, repressing them doesn't help. But we can practice dealing with our emotions properly. This can be done, for example, through meditation, in which we learn to perceive our thoughts and feelings as a neutral observer. If you're not sure how or where to start, seek help—psychotherapy is definitely a safe and professional environment for working with your emotions.

3. Physical self-care

This is about your physical health. And yes, physical self-care can certainly take the form of the aforementioned bubble bath. But there's a lot more to it – such as sufficient exercise that suits you and is good for you, a balanced diet that nourishes and satisfies you, and enough sleep. But breaks and regular relaxation are also an important factor that many of us unfortunately often forget.

4. Selfcare of your environment

What kind of spatial environment do you need to feel comfortable? This includes a bigger picture, such as the country and surroundings you live or want to live in. Do you thrive in a warm climate, or do you prefer a Nordic lifestyle? Whether you enjoy urban living or prefer nature also plays a role.

The more you delve into the details, the more you'll likely be able to take action right away. This form of self-care also involves your home, your personal sanctuary, and how you design it. It's about keeping things tidy and clean around you. How easy it is for us to keep things tidy depends on our personality, but everyone benefits from a harmonious and hygienic environment. So: Do the dishes, put away the laundry, make your bed. You'll feel better immediately afterward, I promise!

5. Mental self-care

Even though they may seem related at first glance, your spiritual well-being is not the same as your mental well-being. Spiritual self-care is about something bigger, something more profound. The most important question is: What gives your life meaning?

This doesn't have to involve selfless volunteer work, five children, or a demanding job with great responsibility. You can find and experience spiritual fulfillment and meaning in a wide variety of areas. What may be family or work for one person may be traveling and discovering new worlds for another. Be honest with yourself here and ask yourself what gives you a sense of purpose and drive.

6. Selfcare in your free time

Leisure activities and hobbies are essential, because our brains need breaks to be creative and productive. What we enjoy is, of course, very individual. Some active types like to be out and about and explore new things, while others seek peace and quiet, perhaps reading a book or streaming a series. Do what makes you feel good—but don't be afraid to think outside the box. Trying something new can give your self-confidence an unexpected boost!

7. Social Selfcare

We all need relationships and social connections—some more, some less. But no one can survive without contact with others. Therefore, nurturing relationships is clearly part of self-care. Spend time with people who are good for you and inspire you, and minimize the time you spend with toxic people and energy vampires.

But social connections aren't a one-way street; it's a matter of balance. It can also be beneficial to do something for others. Maybe you just call your aunt again, ask your elderly neighbor if you can carry his groceries upstairs, or find a completely different way to give something back. You'll notice how good it feels to foster social interaction.

How to use the pillars of self-care

Just don't put too much pressure on yourself! It's not about concocting a perfect plan in a few hours to keep each of the pillars at their optimal level at every point in your life. That can take years. Rather, the pillars can provide a basic framework to help you when you feel like your life is (once again) a bit off track.

Perhaps you define one of the areas to focus on for each day of the week. Perhaps you shift your focus weekly or even monthly. Which topics require how much work depends very much on the individual. There are people who are naturally good at nurturing their relationships but repeatedly fail to take care of their own physical well-being. Others live very healthy lives on a physical level but have lost sight of their emotional and mental health.

Everything is interconnected. If you work on one of the pillars, the others will also benefit. It's simply a matter of degree and time. So, it's best to intuitively identify which area needs the most urgent action – and create your very own self-care routines based on that.

Brigitte

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